When I was younger, I , like many others did not know myself. I worried a lot of what others thought about me. It almost consumed me not to be part of the "it" crowd. I did have friends, a small close group of fellow geeky friends who did everything together. Even though I had friends, I realized I was not part of the mainstream and the mainstream was what society wanted. They were what mattered. So, I was awkward and shy and very a misfit. That was in high school.
College was much different. The scoreboard was a little more equalizing and I fit in many more places. I was even a member of a fraternal organization. Outside I was much more gregarious and outspoken. Inside I was still shy and while it mattered less, I still worried what others thought of me. As I focused on the future and climbing the corporate ladder, I always looked forward.
When I was along I still thought back to some of the kids and people who made my life miserable and wondered if they ever thought of me or remembered how unpleasant they were to me.
Today I live in the present. That old stuff is fat behind me. I rarely think about it. It vaguely comes to mind when it is time to go to the high school reunions or get together with people from high school. They seem to remember nothing that happened. I can live with that. I love to live in each moment and savor it.
Whether it be reading a great book by an open window feeling a cool breeze, or enjoying a venti flat white at Starbucks, to sitting on the beach enjoying the ocean breezes, I am in the present moment. Live for the present because it is all we have right now. Enjoy it like it is your last moment because were are not promised our next one.
Namaste!
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